Shock and Denial
In this stage you may not feel any emotional pain. It’s not a bad reflection on you, just means that you aren’t ready to accept the loss. You’ll try and tell yourself its all some big joke, some big lie and that it can’t be true.
Pain and Guilt
When you have come to terms with the loss you may feel guilty for things you did or didn’t do, said or didn’t say and blame yourself. Loss hurts. This is the stage in which emotionally you will be in pain over the loss of the person. Knowing they are happier, or just safer often doesn’t make things any easier.
Anger and Bargaining
You’ll be angry. At the one you lost. At God. At friends. At yourself. At the wall. At the cat. Even at the fish. You’ll be angry they’re gone and often say or think things like “If I don’t do this ever again, bring them back. please.”
The Depression
You may feel yourself starting to feel ok when suddenly a great sadness overcomes you. An overwhelming sadness, taking over your life temporarily. It is in this stage that one normally realises the seriousness of the loss and the impact it will have on one’s life.
On the Up
You will start to feel things getting better. You’ll finally start adjusting to life without your lost one.
Working through
You’ll start to work again, and build your life back together without your lost one. It won’t be easy, but you know you’ll get there in the end.
Hope
During the last stage, you truly accept and deal with the reality of what has happened. It doesn’t make the pain go away, but you start to find your way through, and get back to the you you used to be. Even without them.
This wheel sounds all good and well. But its not that simple. You don’t just go from 1-7 and poof! finished! You can go from 1-2, back to 1-2-3. back to 2. back to 1. to 3-4. back to 2. etc. But you get there in the end. And even when the black clouds of your mind seem like they will never ease, they eventually will. And when they release the rain and the sun comes up a rainbow appears. And at that moment, you’ll know its ok.
But what do you do until then, you ask?
You wait. It’s all you can do.
http://the-life-of-sally.blogspot.co.uk
Sal
x
Mal du Siecle 